Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Life in Missouri

The St. Louis Post-Dispatch posted the breaking news on April 5th. The ever-vigilant Missouri legislature has identified the next great Threat to Western Civilization As We Know It, and they are working on a law to protect us. The headline screams the threat:

"Missouri bill calls for crackdown on sale of ... baking soda"

Yes, indeed. You read it right. Baking soda. The article begins:

First, the state said you must make a special trip to the pharmacy counter to buy certain cold medicines. That was to curb production of methamphetamine.

Now, a St. Louis legislator wants you to do the same thing to buy an even more common household item — baking soda — because it's used to make crack cocaine.

Sales of cold medications containing pseudoephedrine, such as Sudafed, are strictly regulated in Missouri. Customers must show a photo ID when they buy the medicine. Pharmacists must log the names and addresses of buyers, including how much they buy. People under 18 may not buy the medicines.

The sponsor of the baking soda bill, Rep. Talibdin El-Amin, D-St. Louis, said the same approach was needed for baking soda because crack cocaine is often produced by dissolving powdered cocaine in a mixture of water and baking soda.

Click here to read it all.

Imagine the forthcoming headlines:
  • "Award-winning baker nabbed with 4 boxes of uncut baking soda"
  • "Compulsive housecleaner charged with three counts possession of baking soda"
  • "Antacid addict serves 3-5 years for baking soda possession"
As I understand it, this methamphetamine stuff must also be "cooked" somehow. So I expect they'll soon introduce legislation to ban stoves, microwaves, and campfires.

Y'know, you just can't make this stuff up!

Please … I want my country back.

7 Comments:

Blogger Mike in Texas said...

I'm just glad to know that the Texas legislature isn't the only one full of really stupid people!

4/19/2007 6:55 AM  
Blogger David said...

Of course not, Mike. There's always Louisiana... (rimshot)

4/19/2007 8:48 AM  
Blogger Hilary said...

When the Missouri Legislature is in session, I find myself either amused or horrified. In this case, both.

4/19/2007 10:51 AM  
Blogger Grandmère Mimi said...

There's always Louisiana... (rimshot)

Hey, now, David, I resent that. Compare the munber of executions in Texas and Louisiana. I rest my case.

Plus, there's Bush.

Not that we don't have our share of the stupids. We'd be better off if the legislature was limited to two one-week sessions per year. I tremble when they're meeting.

4/19/2007 11:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't blame me when my refrigerator smells stale....

And I guess that the toothpaste with baking soda will have to be taken off the shelves.

The horrifying thing is - this is MY state legislator (I tried to get someone else in, but it was a 4-way primary).

NancyP

4/19/2007 12:42 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I feel your pain, Nancy P. My legislator is just as stupid. I bet he's one of the co-sponsors.

Why is that a Republican-dominated Missouri legislature seems hellbent on more and more limits on our freedom? Go figger.

4/19/2007 6:36 PM  
Blogger Hilary said...

I usually find myself frustrated by the total lack of ability to lobby them – I mean, consider my illustrious bunch of electeds:

State rep: Kathleen Fares – milquetoast, publicly refuses to take a stand on controversial issues

State senator: Michael Gibbons – voted for concealed carry despite the overwhelming opposition of his district

National rep: Russ Carnahan – he’s usually on the right side, so why bother

Senator McCaskill – same

Senator Bond – he’s not going to change his mind because of anything a mere constituent thinks ...


Don’t even get me started on the petty politics of the state legislature!

4/20/2007 10:35 AM  

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