Magnificent Obsession

The Story of Greg

It has finally occurred to me that Greg Griffith is desperately, hopelessly obsessed with our Elizabeth. There have been plenty of warning signs. But this week I finally realized the man cannot draw a breath without thinking about Elizabeth. In fact, he is so desperate to keep talking about her – and to keep all his friends talking about her – that this week he sought and posted a sermon that she preached ten years ago at an Integrity Eucharist. Ten years ago! After all, the StandFirm sheeple had begun talking about a few other topics, and this just will not do for someone as obsessed as this poor man. He must keep talking about Elizabeth. He cannot help himself.

I'm sure you won't believe this, but Greg was so desperate to refocus his friends' attention on Elizabeth that he plucked five little paragraphs from that sermon and posted them completely out of context. (I know. You're shocked! So am I.) But look at the passages he chose, and think about it. He chose five beautiful paragraphs in which Elizabeth spoke of erotic love – its power and its spiritual dimensions. Well ... it's obvious what is happening to poor Greg. What a sad cry for help! So obvious to us. So hidden to him. But it is ever thus, for those who are in thrall to such an obsession.

However, many of us were grateful to find a link to Elizabeth's sermon, which we hadn't read. In response to popular demand, Elizabeth has posted the complete text. It's a winner! But I digress . . . . (Imagine that!)

As I thought about the non sequitur of Greg's seeking and then posting those paragraphs from such an old sermon – and with absolutely no word of commentary or explanation – it suddenly struck me: Greg is just hopelessly obsessed with Elizabeth. Drawn like a moth to her bright and glowing flame. It must be painful for him, knowing – as he surely does – that she can never be his, for her love and life are pledged elsewhere.

Every now and then I imagine Greg and Elizabeth standing on a majestic mountain. (Of course, Greg would have had to cast a Hogwarts spell to lure Elizabeth there ... but never mind! Just work with me on this, ok?) Greg in his best cowboy outfit – the one he only wears on Thursday nights – and Elizabeth in her lovely gold lame cowgirl outfit. Greg's hands are shoved into his pockets, and he's scowling and kicking the ground, finally snarling to her in frustration: "I wish I could quit you!"

But he can't quit, bless his heart! He is hopelessly fixated on her, and he just cannot help himself. And he probably knows the scene should end with her giving a little shove with her gold lame boots ... which would send him hurtling off the precipice.

Sarah, Matt: Please! Somebody needs to do an intervention before this poor man utterly destroys himself.