Wake-Up Call

It certainly has been a dramatic few days. This sequence for me began in the pre-dawn hours of Saturday morning. I need to tell you why I have been so quiet in these last few days, when so much has been poppin' in the Anglican universe.

Every now and then, one gets a wake-up call. I got one Saturday morning.

I awoke ca. 5:30 a.m. Saturday, slumped over my computer where I had fallen asleep after posting about 6 articles to The Episcopal Majority. As my eyes came open, I saw that ToeWalker our EpiscoGeek had asked me a question. And – eyes and instincts coming awake – I tried to key a reply to him. But – oops! – I found I had no motor control in my right hand. It was like my right hand had fallen asleep. I figured it would pass quickly. But it did not, and still has not.

In those wee hours of Saturday, I quickly e-mailed ToeWalker that I seemed to have suffered a major system malfunction in my right hand, and was going to the emergency room.

I initially thought I would drive myself to the ER. But as I began trying to gather my things here, I realized I was beginning also to suffer some loss of motor control in my left hand too. eeeyikes. Had thought I could drive myself to the hospital, but realized I could not. So I had to take the humiliating step of calling 911 and having an ambulance carry me to the hospital.

Like me, the ambulance guys seemed afraid I was having a stroke. And that seemed to be the initial concern of the ER docs, too. But I was not, thanks be to God.

After a good long time, the ER doc diagnosed it as "radial nerve palsy" -- not a stroke, thank God! which symptoms were suggesting. Which should heal itself. And she released me, so I could walk home from the hospital. ER doc said it should clear up within a week; if not, I'll see a neurologist & they'll take a peek at my brain.

Here's what's happening: In my right hand [and I am right-handed] it's kinda like paralysis. I tell my fingers to move & they don’t. I give my hand & fingers commands, and they just laugh at me. I can't hold anything, can't exercise any motor control. There's noticeably reduced motor control in my left hand too. Both hands have a tendency to move & twitch on their own now. Typing is awfully slow & tedious. I continue reading e-mail, but replying or writing is excruciatingly tiring.

So on this weekend when I have been dyin' to comment on the news & developments occurring in the Anglican Communion – and wanting to post quick replies to the comments at both TEM & MOL – this formerly fast touch-typist has been reduced to very, very slow and frustrating hunt-and-peck communications. I've been vacillating between anger and frustrated-tears as I have tried to cope with this.

& some of u have rec'd notes like this – those of u whom I trust 2 try 2 hear me w/o careful keying. Thx to u 4 hearing n trying 2 decipher. U R the 1s with hom I don’t feel need 2 b careful.

Tomorrow I go to my primary doc. I'll let you all know what I learn.

One last thought. As I was fully engaged in my pity-party today, I received Barbara Crafton's latest Almost Daily e-mo, and I am just slack-jawed and grateful for what I do have. And praying fervently that we will have her voice with us forever. My burden is light, and my yoke is easy. Please send all your prayers Barbara's way!