Wednesday, March 10, 2010

God Hates Figs

What does God (supposedly) hate? Fred Phelps and his "church" have been trying to tell America their version of what God hates. But, in the process, he and his church have become a laughing-stock.

In my continuing mission to parody them, here's my latest entry. Phelps & Co. think "God hates fags." But they got it all wrong.

In case you can't read it clearly, the shirt says:

You heard wrong
God hates FIGS

You can buy the shirt here.

God and I are in 100% agreement on this one. I'm pretty sure figs are an abomination.


Blogger ROBERTA said...

very clever.....but does God really not like fig newtons?

3/11/2010 12:28 AM  
Blogger Lisa Fox said...

I loathe Fig Newtons ... Therefore, I am quite certain that the faith once and for all delivered to the saints declares Fig Newtons an abomination.

How am I doing at channeling the Con-Evos theology??

3/11/2010 12:42 AM  
Blogger Ann said...

We know God hates figs - Jesus cursed one fig tree to death and wanted to chop down another one. I however will risk the wrath of God and eat fig newtons -we even planted a fig tree in the yard of our new home.

3/11/2010 8:31 AM  
Blogger ginny s. said...

Hilarious t-shirt, but don't go wearing one in an Italian neighborhood: that would be heresy. I think God does love fresh figs just off the tree, but probably not fig newtons so much. Remember that Jesus gave the barren fig tree another year to bear some delicious fruit.

3/11/2010 12:50 PM  
Blogger Leonard said...

God adores Fig Newton enthusiasts wherever they may nosh.

3/13/2010 6:59 PM  
Blogger Lisa Fox said...

LOL, y'all.

I propose we move the fig (and Fig Newton) debate to the forefront of the Anglican Communion discussions ... and shake the dust off our feet about the whole Anglican Covenant thing. Figs are obviously more important and more central to the Gospel, don't you agree?

3/14/2010 11:17 PM  
Blogger MadPriest said...

But what about the incarnation of the figgy pudding at Christmas? I fear that you have slipped into the slough of revisionist heresy, Lisa.

3/16/2010 5:44 AM  
Blogger Brad Evans said...

Perhaps if xtians ate more figs, they wouldn't be so full of sh*t.

3/16/2010 4:02 PM  
Blogger MadPriest said...

Sad Brad is a bit hyper today. He's all over everyone's blogs. He really should remember to get his script filled before he runs out.

3/16/2010 4:04 PM  
Blogger Lisa Fox said...

What is this figgy pudding thing, MP? Help a colonialist out here. Seriously.

Yes, there is always the danger that I've slipped into the slough of revisionist heresy.

And thanks for your recommendation re: Brad. I was about to blast his comment into oblivion, but I'll leave it for you.

3/16/2010 9:31 PM  

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