Friday, September 29, 2006


When all was said and done, I couldn't do it. I could not make the 500-mile drive, when it all came down. For the 1st time in 20 years of doing workshops and making conference presentations and consultations, I had to bale on a national conference appearance. And am now feeling like a P.O.S.

This is Day 7 of The Weird Hand Paralysis/No Motor Control Thing [TWHPNMCT]. I've been mostly optimistic and stoical through it all. Trying to pack last night, the brave front started crumbling, as I became aware that my left hand, too, seems to be succumbing to TWHPNMCT. I hoped it would pass. It did not. It was even worse this morning. I was unable to make the drive. So I am still here at home.

Fortunately, the conference organizers were most understanding. The nun with whom I had worked to arrange this is not just a nun, but a former nurse. She has been marvelous through this – offering both medical and spiritual support.

The tremors of left hand and foot are worse today, lots worse. Right hand about the same as I wrote yesterday.

Reached the doc's office today; they say blood work was all normal, and I should just sit tight and check with them early next week. "Sit tight" is hard.

Meanwhile, in the blogosphere, this just flat cracked me up. There's a woman up in Canada who obsessively checks my blog many, many times a day. [I know, cuz I see her "hits,"] I think she's a closet lesbian who has developed a deep-seated obsession for me. She offered this armchair diagnosis today on one of The Other Side's blogs:

Oh, so THIS is the website that caused Lisa Fox to blow a gasket last week! I didn’t know what she was talking about. Incidentally, she’s sick right now; you might want to add her to your prayer list. Not a stroke, but the symptoms sound very similar and quite scary. And I even thought a week ago that someone filled with so much rage was a prime candidate for a stroke; it’s just not healthy.

I suppose I can quit talking with my doc now. This "Christian" has given me my diagnosis. It's all about rage – not nerve endings. What ya wanna bet she's also a member of the Flat Earth Society??? As Elizabeth+ would say: Ya just can't make this stuff up!

And with that ridiculous note from the "reasserter" side. I'll finish this for tonight.


Anonymous MadPriest said...

This is not a diagnosis. It is information.

These sound like a more pronounced manifestation of the physical symptoms I suffered when I was really ill with my madness. I have also known people with, what we refer to in the U.K. as, M.E. with exactly the same problems that you are having with your hands, especially the claw like clenching.

9/30/2006 3:22 AM  
Blogger Saint Pat said...

Lisa, I am so sorry to hear this. Keep on top of the medical stuff, and we will all keep praying hard.

9/30/2006 4:15 AM  
Blogger Ann said...

The hand clenching is a symptom of atrophy from the other stuff - not mental.

9/30/2006 9:52 AM  
Blogger Min O'Pause said...

Gee, Lisa, it looks like our 'pal' from the Great White North is at it again!

Don't you find Ms. Mean Glee's obsession with you sort of pathetic, yet comical?

Who knew she was a doctor? I wonder if all of her pent up frustration (sexual and otherwise)is manifesting itself in the form of this maniacal hatred she has?

As well, using her logic--every time I read her blog, when she's foaming about the mouth about the Episcopal church, she reminds me of a composite character from Arthur Miller's The Crucible--I suppose that her own anger and rage caused her children's autism???

I admire your courage, Lisa, as you continue to be such an obsession for her and other bloggers.

As well, I thought she converted to Catholicism, so why is she so obsessed over the Episcopal and Anglican church?

I hope what ever this palsy is, that it clears up for you.

9/30/2006 4:59 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

THX, Min.

Yes, I can agree she's pathetic, but am not yet seeing the comedy.

I don't think she's a doc. But I have some friends doing research. As u know, we leave footprints when we wander the blogosphere. I know she's A Sick Puppy. With luck, we'll soon be able to identify which particular breed of Sick Puppy she is. Stay tuned.

Yes. I think she's secretly in love with me. Or at least obsessed with me. Nobody else hits my site as often as she does. If I had her husband & kids, I'd probably seek the same kind of escape she's seeking – poor thing!

9/30/2006 7:49 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

MadPriest, you're the best! I'd swap my doc 4 u any day!

9/30/2006 7:50 PM  
Blogger Elizabeth Kaeton said...

My dear,

I've been "up to my armpits" with the beginning of the program year at the church and not paying attention to keeping up with anyone's blog - even my own.

Lord, have mercy!

No, you can't make this stuff up and fact is often stranger than fiction.

I've just finished my sermon for tomorrow on Mark 9:38-50. Not exactly cheery stuff flowing from the lips of Jesus.

I think Jesus is exaggerating to make a point.

Indeed, life sometimes exaggerates to make a point. It's life's way of exaggerating to make the point that you couldn't have gotten any other way.

I'm not saying that what you are going through is "mental". By no means!

Here's where Peterson's translation (The Message) is helpful - especially vs. 50:

"Everyone's going through a refining fire sooner or later, but you'll be well preserved, protected from the eternal flames. Be preservatives yourselves. Preserve the peace."

Know that God is with you in the midst of this time of life's exaggeration. God is with you in the midst of the refiner's fire.

And, I join countless other in lifting you up in prayer.

9/30/2006 9:40 PM  
Blogger Min O'Pause said...


I was being sarcastic, when I said "who knew she was a doctor?"

Anyway, keep up the good work on your blog, and you are certainly being lifted up in prayer by many--Susan and me included.


10/01/2006 8:37 AM  
Anonymous Margaret said...

Keeping you in my prayers, good lady.

10/01/2006 6:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Every thought is a physical action.
Every illness is physical.
Mental illness is not something different to physical illness, it's just a form of physical illness in the same way as heart disease isn't separate from but is a form of physical illness.

I have no idea what sort of illness you have but it will be physical and as real as any other illness, whatever its cause.

Unfortunately, because many people divorce the mental from the physical, mental illness is seen as a weakness of the mind. Also people do not understand the real, acute physical pain that usually accompanies mental illness.

I think many people believe that the mind and the spirit (or soul) are the same thing so they see mental processes not as organic but originating, in some way, from outside the body. I have no idea what or where the human spirit is but I do know that my thoughts come through the bio-electrical goings on in my brain.

10/01/2006 6:35 PM  
Blogger Dr. Alice said...

"I don't think she's a doc. But I have some friends doing research. As u know, we leave footprints when we wander the blogosphere. I know she's A Sick Puppy. With luck, we'll soon be able to identify which particular breed of Sick Puppy she is. Stay tuned.

Yes. I think she's secretly in love with me. Or at least obsessed with me. Nobody else hits my site as often as she does. If I had her husband & kids, I'd probably seek the same kind of escape she's seeking – poor thing!"

Really. Well, I *am* a doctor, nd I would not presume to diagnose your ilness as mental - in fact, I would not presume to diagnose you at all, since I am not a neurologist. I also think she - I know to whom you are referring, since I visit her website often - is exponentially more kind and stable than you are. (I'll give my website here, since I presume that most of your readers will jump to the conclusion that I am she:

I have not, to this point, blogged at all about the ECUSA disaster because it is not my main focus for blogging, but it is something that makes me sick at heart. I will say that I visit Brad Drell and others regularly and I have NEVER seen the level of hatred and bigotry on their websites that I have seen on yours.

Do with this comment as you will. I will say that I think it's time I joined the good fight, and I am not speaking of your "side."

10/01/2006 10:32 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Knock your socks off Dr. Alice! I shall leave your comment here for its sheer ludicrousness. The wacky 'Dr. Mabuse' goes stalking the blogosphere, seeking whom she may ridicule, attacking rank strangers. If she's your kind of Christian, then may you two find peace, joy and happiness together. We are indeed known by our friends, and I remain honored by mine, here and in physical reality. Enjoy yours.

10/01/2006 11:33 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Ann, Pat, Min, Elizabeth, MadPriest, Margaret: Great and many thanks! Y'all are the best!! You keep me going.

And Min, I'm sorry I briefly lost my sense of irony; it's usually right by my side, but sometimes the seriousness and intensity of all this makes me overlook it.

10/01/2006 11:39 PM  
Anonymous David Huff said...

If "Dr. Alice" thinks there are no bad vibes going on at Brad Drell's or other "reasserter" sites, she just ain't lookin' real hard ;) (either that, or she's much more forgiving of her cohorts than of folks on the "other" side...)

Comments like that are just trolling anyway - I'd ignore them.

10/09/2006 4:04 PM  
Blogger Grandmère Mimi said...

Lisa, I'm so sorry. I will pray for you, my friend.

And no matter what you feel like you are not a POS. ;o)

10/01/2007 11:13 PM  

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